"remember that time you disappointed dad and told him you wanted to quit golf and do art instead? Remember the face of disappointment and anger he had? Remember the courage you had at that moment? Whatever it is you're doing in life I hope you have the same exact courage you did back then. I know I should be expecting a bright future for my future self but I just want you to know that as long as I'm doing whatever I love I'm not a single bit disappointed in you.
By the time you open this letter I hope you have a new chapter in your life and I hope that you've matured"
This was the hardest part for me to get through without tears. I wrote this. Me. A whole year ago, the same me, but slightly different.
I've always thought of myself as the type to mess up a perfectly good timing. If it isn't broken, break it. I've always been that kind of person. The type to always have something fucked up right when everything seems perfect, the type to always fuck things up.
I wrote this letter to myself a year ago at university when my teachers asked us to write something to our future self. Of course at that moment I thought like it was the most stupid thing a teacher can ask their students to do because how would anyone know what they'll be doing in the future? I thought it was stupid but those words hit me hard.
I've never been a person who's good with words in front of others, I'd always be the one to run away from confrontation mostly because, yes, I'm a coward. I don't like it when I have to face something in the face because I'd just wither away.
So this will be like another letter to my future self, I hope you open this up one day and laugh at the memories and smile at the painful ones.
Battle scars are worth the tale.
You need to let go of the past, you need to stop longing for the impossible, you need to settle down the war in your own head.
The dissatisfaction with not being someone else needs to stop.
And I hope you live to tell the tales of all the different births of the scars you carry around proudly.
Goodluck. I love you.
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